Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Essay1
The more frequent communication, the better relationship among family members. I firmly believe that elder members of a family tend to communicate better each other than younger family members. The essay will explain the reasons behind my argument with examples.
Firstly, I suppose elder family members tend to have more common interests to talk and share their opinion about. This is mainly because they have already spent long time and went through both good and bad time together. For instance, a recent study from HIS which is a famous travel agency in Japan, showed that elder Japanese couple went on 10 trips in 120 days on average. Therefore, old people have more topics to talk to each other.
Secondly, I think old family members are more likely to have more free time than young members of family. This becomes especially true when it comes to retired people obviously because they don’t need to work in daytime to make money which makes them impossible to communicate until night. Take, for example, a survey conducted by WHO, which illustrated that those over age of 65 have 50 hours free time a week while those who are equal or younger than 35 only have 10 hours. Consequently, family members of late can more easily allocate their time to communicate each other.
To conclude from the examples and arguments given I strongly believe that there are more communications between family members of late than young members.
Essay2
How can we provide greater opportunities to kids in order for them to foster their skill and imagination? I believe letting kids experience enjoyable activities such as video games and sports is better than read books. This essay will discuss both sides, using examples with role playing games and a study conducted in Japan to demonstrate points and support arguments.
Firstly, playing role playing games on consoles like the Playstation develops active skills and spatial awareness which are considered necessary to survive in the 21st century. This is largely because that player needs to actively explore a 3D world to complete their missions while reading book is more passive experience. Take, for example, a recent study from a famous Japanese gaming company indicated that kids playing role playing games showed 20% better active skills and 50% better spatial awareness skills gained. Therefore gaming contributes to develop these skills.
Secondly, sport fosters cognitive and physical abilities through competition. This is due to the fact that these skills are necessary to play better at any kinds of sports, and practicing sports naturally develops them without realizing it. For example, a study from the Ministry of Education in Japan reported that students in a school requiring every student to belong after-school sport club showed significantly better cognitive and physical skills than students in other schools in Tokyo. Consequently, the more frequently kids play sport, the better they get cognitive and physical abilities.
To conclude from the examples and arguments given I firmly agree that children can develop better skills and imagination through enjoyable activities than reading.
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