IELTS ESSAY CORRECTION: January 2017

Tuesday, 31 January 2017

IELTS ESSAY BEN GREAT WORK!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection

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Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection There is argument that the ownership of a product by copyright laws is beneficial for the people and society, but others think that this copyright claim work blocks the creativity of the artists. I think that the rights of the patent are essential to protect and ensure professionals interests.
There is no doubt, every artist works hard to make their invention unique. In other words, professionals or companies invest money, manpower and valuable time to make products so that the customers can enjoy. Therefore, they deserve to apply for the patent of their items, and by claiming the possession, companies secure their investment. As a result of this safeguard by the laws, companies deliver quality things, as well as consumers, receive the full benefit of these things. As an example, in USA copyright laws is very strict and because of that rules, recently the law enforcement agency caught the pirate bay owner, which uploads the movies, music and other applications which is a clear violation of the local and international copyright laws.
Secondly, copyright infringement laws keep the market competitive and discourage institutions or individual to plagiarism the original works. As it is legally enlisted in the court by the owner, no other party can produce or publish the items without permission of the parent companies. If anyone tries to do this, they will be brought under laws and either fined or give punishment according to the rules and regulation. For example, the patent lawsuit between two rival mobile companies, Samsung and Apple is well known to all where Samsung pay fine as they the copyright laws.
In conclusion, copyright laws is to guard the creative people’s thought and for the betterment of the society.

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The bar diagram shows the percentage of four different calorie sources for British males of three separate age groups.
In 0-24 aged British men, more than 40% calorie comes from dairy products, meanwhile, around half of the calorie requirement of 24-49 age group is fulfilled by meat. Similarly, approximately one-fifth calorie obtained from dairy items in 24-49 age group and interestingly, nearly similar percent calorie comes from meat in 24 years and less aged, UK males. Furthermore, vegetables supply less than 20% calorie in below 50 age groups.
On the other hand, over 50 UK men, more than two third of their calorie requirement meet from pulses which is around five times higher than the other age groups calorie source. Moreover, about 20% calorie demand satisfy by dairy and meat in the over 50 age group. In the case of vegetables, it ranks the lowest position, only one tenth calorie comes from it.

It is clear that dairy and meat are the major resources of calorie in below 50 age groups whereas pulses are the main item to meet the energy requirement of 50 plus UK males.

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ashfaqul-IELTS-STAR-Copyright

It is clear that dairy and meat are the major resources of calorie in below 50 age groups whereas pulses are the main item to meet the energy requirement of 50 plus UK males.

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Alessandra-IELTS-Family-Reading-GREAT!!!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection The issue of improving abilities such as imagination in childhood has sparked debates. Some specialist claim that reading is the most important form to achieve that, however others argue activities such as sports and games, commonly appreciate by children, enhance their skills more efficiently. In this essay, I shall discuss this issue using relevant data from Health and Sports entities to support my point of view.
To begin with, playing on games consoles enhance active skills and spatial awareness, which are relevant abilities to acquire during the growing period. Recent studies from the American Academy of Pediatrics indicated that, children who play on electronical devices as PlayStation develop greater cognitive ability and succeed better at university later in life. Therefore, there is strong evidence that stimulating this source of entertainment in childhood can result in positive implications.
Secondly, rather than reading, which is a sedentary task, practicing sports have significantly greater benefits. Soccer or any other competitive game result in both physical and cognitive improvement. According to the English Sports Academy, introducing competitive activities in childhood, leads to better social behaviour and higher grades at school. Moreover, dynamic activities set off on early age reduces the chances of obesity in the future.
To conclude, there is strong evidence to support that sports activities and electronical games are associated to positive outcomes such as cognitive development of and spatial awareness. Theses benefices would not be achieved through reading itself. Hopefully, educational institutes will implement these entertainments on schools on a regular basis.

Communication is less between family members of late. Do you agree or disagree?
To what extent do you agree?
Debates over the lack of conversation amongst relatives are polarizing opinion year on year. Some claim this is consequence of the internet development and spread, whereas others affirm the long shift hours at work by family members are the main reason. In this essay, I shall argue both ideas taking into account relevant evidence from UK Epidemic research to support my point of view.
To begin with, it is a paradoxical issue that internet and cyber communication revolution have provoked less interaction among close relatives. In fact, people stay connected on apps such as Facebook or Instagram for long hours instead of talking to their surround family. According to the UK Council for Internet, the time spent online has doubled over the last few years, while personal interaction such as family dinner or lunch have become rare. Therefore, it is evident that if the internet usage continues gaining in popularity there will be less and less real communication.
Secondly, the family union was affected since the women have started working and contributing to the family income. Consequently, parents’ long shift hours obligate children to stay in educational activities for longer. Recent studies from the English Government indicate that the amount of hours parents and children spend together has dropped dramatically since women set off working, and it correspond basically to dinner time.
To conclude, there are compelling reasons to support that recent changes have led to less communication among family members. Hopefully, governments and authorities will create matters to control internet usage and reduce workers` shift hours in order to bring back real interaction and conversation into society.

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Int-nat-mktg-Jigyasu-IELTS

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection International market is sometimes seen as invasive and an intrusion into the country in question. Others argue that it is a necessary and economical form of education in addition to spreading ideas, language and culture.
Nowadays, international market is becoming vast system of merchandising and playing an important role in the country’s growth. Although others believe that it is an essential and an economical kind of promoting ideas, languages and cultures, international market can be resulted in destruction of the domestic market. This essay will analyze whether it is valuable or destructive to be adopted.
First of all, global market causes brain drain, as it hires well trained and well educated people that are the real assets of the nation. Secondly, it can lead to recession in the country’s economy. This is due to the fact that global market can depreciate the country’s currency in respect of one or more nations. All in all, international market can be resulted in downsizing of the nation’s own marketplace.
Moreover, despite international market probably has negative impact on the domestic market, it can also heal various citizens that thrives the country’s wealth. This is because international market enhances employment opportunities among the residents to generate ideas. Furthermore, it enables resident to learn the numerous language and cultures come from different countries all over the world. Therefore, international market is unavoidable and wealthy kind of academic system in respect to spreading ideas, languages and cultures.
Overall, international market is advantageous for the nation’s growth, however it can be invasive and intrusive for domestic market. It is predicated that, international market will take over the role of domestic market and promotes different languages and cultures globally.

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Jacob-IELTS-Copyright-GOOD-WORK!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection The issue of lawful distribution of copyrighted material has grown in importance since the advent of the dot-com boom. The internet has facilitated the sharing of any type of media, and although it may seem an improvement to the consumer, it has meant great losses to the owners of the content.

Copyright legislation is made to protect the owner of the invention, therefore it stimulates artists and entrepreneurs to create further. This is largely because when copyright law is enforced correctly, it may generate revenue for the creation’s owner, thus prompting creative people to produce more to have more profits. For example, Spotify revealed that 50% of net profits are for the artists that allow them to use their songs. Therefore, without copyright laws it would be more difficult for them to make a profit and as a consequence they would be less motivated to work in new products.

Society needs regulation for almost everything and this is no exception. Even if without proper regulation some products could be less expensive, and in the case of medical treatment, provide a positive impact in many patients, it is important to consider the amount of effort and resources invested into creating a product. A recent study in Germany showed that pharmaceutical companies in this country spend about 30% of their profits on research. For this reason, regulation allows companies to keep generating revenues, but at the same time encourages them to keep investing in innovation.

To conclude, it must be acknowledged the importance of making and enforcing regulation, because it may have positive implications in entrepreneur’s efforts to continue developing.

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Scenario 1: A Formal Apology and Explanation

Dear Sir/Madam,

My name is John Smith, student number 12345. I am contacting you regarding a letter received from the University of Albion because I failed to attend to the math test on March 2nd and also to provide a valid reason for my absence. For this reason it was opened a disciplinary procedure with the following number; 543.

In this letter I intend to apologize to the Examination Committee for any inconvenience caused and also to provide an explanation. The reason why I could not be present the day of the test was because I had the flu. The day after I went to the general practitioner’s office to obtain valid evidence but he was not available, so I had to return the day after. In this moment I have the letter of the doctor and I can provide it to you upon request.

Considering that I still have to take the test, I kindly ask you if you can provide another date for the exam.

Once again, I apologize for any inconvenience.

Kind regards,
Mr. Pardi

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IELTS-ESSAY-Christina

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Essay Categories:

The table shows the amount of visitors to the Ashdown Museum in a
specific year.

Below it the left pie chart provides information on
the satisfaction level the visitor had the year before refurbishment
of the museum, while on the right side the graph depicts the
satisfaction level after the renovation of it.

It is clearly visible that the number of visitors to the Ashdown
Museum has significantly increased, from
over 70,000 visitors to more than 90,000 after the refurbishment.

The pie chart on the left indicates that before the renovation half of
the visitors were dissasfied and very dissatisfied with almost 40
percent of museum lovers very enthusiastic about it. Conversely, the
year after the renovation the largest part of visitors (at around 75%)
was more than satisfied about the improvements done the museum.

Overall the museum’s visit have augmented of almost 20,000 units after
the refurbishment and also the satisfaction of the visitors has
largely increased.

The bar chart provides information abut the number of passengers that
were using three different airports of NY city: La Guardia, JF Kennedy
and Newark. Data is given for the period of time between 1995 and
2000.

From left to right, the airport that had the highest number of
visitors was La Guardia. Starting at around 35 millions of visitors
in 1995 and constantly progressing reaching almost the double of them
in 2000. The second most popular airport has been JF Kennedy with 25%
of travelers in 1995, the number then has moderately fluctuated over
the given years and has reached just over 45% in 2000.
The least busy airport has been Newark: in the first given year
only 15 millions used the facility and in the next four years the
travelers increased reaching a peak in 1998 ( at round 40
million), then, the number of travelers remained stable at the same
level also in 1999 and 2000.

Overall La Guardia has been the busiest airport among the three, followed by JFK and Newark.

The table provides information about different types of leisure
activities performed by 6,800 Scots. People are divided un three age
categories (16-24/25-44/45-74) and the total amount of participants
over 16 years of age is given.

From left to right, It is visible that among your adults (16-24)
visual arts are the most popular form of cultural activity (30%)
while computer based activities are the least favorite. For the second
age group (25-44) undertaking any type of crafting is the most
popular activity at 22 percent while writing has the lowest point
percentage with 6%

For the 45+age group, once again crafting has the highest percentage
and both writing and computer based activities the lowest rates.
Looking at the all age groups (16 and over) any performance such as singing,
dancing, playing music, has the lovers largest percentage while
computer is once again at the bottom of the preferences.

Overall, the most popular recreational activities performed by Scots
are crafting, visual arts and singing/ dancing. Conversely, computers
and writing are not significantly popular.

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Monday, 30 January 2017

Chahal-IELTS-STAR-Technology

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Should humans adapt to technology or should technology adapt to us? Is technology making us intellectually weaker or more intelligent? Give reasons to answer and include any relevant examples from your experience.
The issue of technological adaptation has grown in importance year on year from last 2 decades. Despite the tremendous benefits that can be derived by using recent technology, it must not be forgotten that over reliance on technical gadgets has detrimental effects on human intellectual evolution and social relations. This essay will discuss both issues with appropriate examples from WHO and Harvard University.
On one hand there is ample evidence to suggest the enormous benefits of internet usage in daily life. Communication has become easy, faster and simple by using electronic means of communication. Facebook, Twitter, Whataap and Skype keep us connected to our surroundings. On the other hand we are losing our traditional ways of communication like writing letters and face to face communication, which may further lead to social isolation, seclusion and mental issues. A recent study from WHO has proven that 30 % people are struggling with depression as compared to earlier generations.
Furthermore, over reliance on technology is making human race to lose their creative skills and making them intellectually weak. For instance, a recent study from Harvard University has shown that in modern era 3 out of 4 students are unable to perform simple mathematical calculations without calculators. Therefore it proves that over dependency on technology is making us intellectually incompetent.

To sum up, I am of the opinion that excess of everything is bad. We should use technology wisely but should not solely depend up on it.

The horizontal bar graph depicts predicted information of tourists travelling to four major cities London, Paris, Madrid and Istanbul by citizens of three countries that is Mexico, Canada and USA.
The travelers from Mexico will travel to London, Madrid ,Paris and Istanbul,20 thousands,70 thousands, 30 thousands and 20 thousands respectively. The Canadians will visit maximum75 thousands to Istanbul, while only 30 thousands visit Madrid , which is just half the Mexican visiting the same. Approximately 50,000 visit Paris and London.
Further moving to USA maximum people will travel to Paris which is just double the visitor from Canada. Eighty thousands American will be visiting London which is 4 times more than Mexicans visiting London. So visits to London and Paris is steadily inclining if we look at Mexico, Canada and USA.
Highest Number of Mexican will visit Madrid, Maximum Canadians will visit Istanbul while for American preferable point of interest will be Paris.

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Manir-IELTS-STAR!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection “International marketing is sometimes seen as invasive and an intrusion into the country in question.
Others argue that it is a necessary and economical form of education in addition to spreading ideas, language and culture.”

Marketing was known long time ago, and considered to be essential for any business. Marketing used to be local on a country level in the past but internet and technology helped marketing to be on a global wide, in what is called international marketing. International marketing is getting more popular these days.

On the first hand, international marketing has many positives. Firstly, it improves competition between countries, this competition results in better quality of products and goods. Secondly, international marketing helps goods better distribution all over the world. Moreover, it helps goods high availability. Finally, international marketing transfers ideas, language and culture between different countries, resulting better communication and understanding between people.

On the second hand, international marketing has some negatives. In the first place, it can be considered as invasive and intrusion towards the desired country thus, can be forbidden by their its regulations. Furthermore, it can have bad effects on the targeted country economy and industries, whereby, many industries may be unable to compete other countries industries, thus, many factories may be closed as a result. Finally, some products may be against some cultures and may face denials by people of that country.

In my opinion, international marketing advanteges are greater than its disadvanteges, Thus, I do encourage the international marketing. But, governments are ought to put fair regulations in order to protect their local industries and control any expected bad consequence that may result.

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Patrick-IELTS-Correction!-Good-Work

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Task

The bar chart illustrates the proportion of energy sources from four food products for British men of three different age groups.
Most of the caloric intake for male between 0 and 24 years, come from dairy products which stand at approximately 43%. Meat and vegetables both comprise exactly 20% of consumption whereas pulses stand at around 17%. In the next age group, half of their energy sources come from meat and nearly a quarter from dairy. Vegetables and pulses are responsible for 15% and 10% respectively of their energy sources.
On the other hand, in males of over 50 years old Pulses make up nearly 65% of their caloric intake, while Meat provide them with a fifth of their energy. Dairy and vegetables are responsible for 25% of their consumption with the former being at 15% and the latter at 10%.
Overall, the main energy sources in the three age groups vary considerably with dairy, meat and Pulses being the highest in the youngest, middle age and elderly respectively.

Word: 169

Task 2:
Do copyright laws limit creativity or reward it? Would society function better without such rules and regulations?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Intellectual property policies were created to prevent people from stealing ideas. Without these laws, inventors would not have any recognition for what they created. Therefore, in my opinion they enhance imagination and has a purpose in society. This essay will discuss how such laws represent a recognition of achievement and how they provide an incentive for people to achieve high standards.
Firstly, copyright laws encourage artists to think outside the box. It acts as a security, if their work is stolen, they will be able to bring the culprit to court. Recent research has shown that 95% of song authors that suit for breach of copyright were successful. Therefore, they were able to be compensated for their work that was copied by a third party. It assures that if their work is stolen, they still get some recognition for their effort.
Secondly, these laws provide people with an incentive to give the best of themselves to produce exquisite pieces of art. Without any regulations, anyone could claim that a painting or sculpture is their own when in fact they stole it. For instance, a retrospective study conducted by The University of Melbourne showed that most sculptures and paintings from the middle age had unknown creators because several people were claiming the same artwork. Thus, with the advent of intellectual property laws, no one apart from the creator can claim the work.
In conclusion, copyright laws act as a motivation for artists to perform at their best, and refrain people to steal someone else work. Consequently, it benefited the society as a whole.
Word:262

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Saturday, 28 January 2017

RISHA-IELTS-STAR-ESSAY-COPYRIGHT

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The issues of copyright laws have grown in importance since the beginning of the governmental bodies. In my opinion, the impacts of this laws in society is significant but the copyright invasion can be discouraging. The copyright laws protect the original works of authorship and help it be published by the name of the creator.

Firstly, there is ample of evidence that copyright laws have been a culprit in limiting creativity. This is because, in the modern times people are unable to recreate from other’s content without permission. For instance, recent studies by Bollywood film producers showed that if there were no copyright laws, about 90% of novel would have been transformed into wide screen movies. Therefore, it is clear that with the increased concern on copyright laws, a substantial group of people are discouraged to use their artistic creation.

Secondly, the implementation of copyright rules and regulations on the public have a negative impact. This is because, if these rules are regulated, people living in developing countries will not have easy access to the copyrighted material through internet. For example, several text books available on the internet without copyright ,in recent survey in developing countries showed that the literacy rates increased dramatically from 60% to 90 %. Thus, the society where people cannot pay for their education, would obtain extraordinary benefits.

To conclude form the examples and arguments given, I firmly believe that copyright laws are important in order to protect original ideas but also limit the creativity.

GENERAL TASK 1
Scenario 1: A Formal Apology and Explanation
You have received a letter from your university of Albion demanding a reason for your absence from an exam. You were ill that day, but failed to submit the evidence. Write a letter to the Examinations Committee explaining your situation. You should include:
1) Apologies for the situation
2) Identification for yourself (Name, Student Number, Case Number)
3) An explanation of what had happened and any possible evidence you may have
4) Possible resolutions to consider

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am Risha Sharma (student number – L 07). I am writing to discuss my absence on 25th January ,2017 when I missed the chemistry exam (code-CHEM07). I apologize for not informing on priority over to my absence for the exam.

My reason for absence was that I had fallen severely ill day before the exam. After check up from the campus doctor, the reports showed I had malaria. Due to which I was hospitalized for 3 days. However, I have a medical report and hospital bills attached along. This will confirm my infirmity of the time.

If Possible, I would ask if I could be offered a chance to retake the exam or to be given the estimate mark by my course teacher. So, that I would not rank low in the semester.

My deepest apologies for the inconvenience.

Yours Faithfully

Risha Sharma.

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PATRICK-IELTS-STAR!!!!!!!!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and imaginations than reading. To what extent do you agree? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.
It is argued that playing with a kid has a greater impact on the development of abilities and creativity than reading. In my opinion, I agree with this statement as it aids in spatial awareness and social development. This essay will discuss the effects of games consoles and sports in enhancing abilities that are impossible with reading alone.
Firstly, video games provide the child with the ability to develop his coordination and imagination. Game controllers require adequate movement of the fingers and the kid is able to put their motion into visual representation. Recent research performed by the Institute of Child Development has shown that 50% of children who played Tetris, had a better perception of objects in relation to them and were more creative when they were drawing. Consequently, it was shown that some consoles games have a positive impact on child development.
Secondly, physical activities such as sports is vital for the growth of young ones. It helps the maturing child in developing social skills and development of the body. A study conducted by Harvard University showed that 73% of people engaged in sports were more likely to have five or more friends in adulthood, in addition they found that they were less likely to have muscular injury when working. Therefore, sports have a positive effect later with interpersonal relationships and maturity of the body.
In conclusion, in my point of view activities such as consoles and sports should not be disregarded in childhood as they provide the foundations in enhancing creativity and social interactions which reading alone cannot achieve.
Words:265

Communication is less between family members of late. Do you agree or disagree?
To what extent do you agree?
It is argued that interactions between family members are decreasing. In my point of view, although devices such as mobile phones are becoming more accessible, communication is on the decline. This essay will discuss the impact of television and work on communication within families.
Firstly, television has become increasingly popular over the last thirty years so that every household possess one. Thus, more people spend most of their free time watching programs rather than communicating with each other. For instance, a recent survey conducted by the Australian institute of family studies showed that 80% of people spent time in front of the television during their time at home and 60% of them acknowledged that it has negatively impacted interactions within their families. Therefore, the study concluded that the members were talking less to each other than in the past.
Secondly, working hours have become longer, with the majority of the population doing a minimum of 8 hours shift per day. Often, these people are exhausted when they arrive home and just want to relax leading to less interactions between members of the family. A recent study has identified that the decline in interactions was directly proportional to the time they spent at work. Consequently, this leads to a reduction in time spent together and negatively impact on communication.
In conclusion, despite the advent of communication devices, interactions within family members are on the decline as people are spending more time watching Television and spend long hours in their jobs. Thus, I agree that communication between family members is on the decline.
Word: 267

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Chahal-IELTS-COPYRIGHT

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Do copyright laws limit creativity or reward it ? Would society function better without these rules and Regulations? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
Whether the copyright laws limit creativity of creative people or reward them has become a serious debatable issue from the inception of government bodies to administer such regulations. This essay will discuss both sides with appropriate examples from the business and music worlds.
Copyright law was approved and administered to save the right of the authors, musicians, or any creators so that they can earn money from their innovations.

The economist proves that the patent law was unsuccessful to do so, rather it gave birth to monopoly businesses. Many drugs and publications became so expensive that it is out of reach of a common citizen. For example Valeant pharmaceutical has patent nitroglycerine which is very important drug for heart attack but very expensive. After they sold the formula to generic drug companies price fell. Therefore it proves that without this law society can work well and everybody can afford the essentials needed to make their life better.
It is crystal clear that in this modern world of technology and internet era patent law is limiting creativity of people.
Take the example from music world as the internet and technology allow more efficient ways to create and share contents which was limited by copyright law.
Large media companies are lobbying and filing suites to preserve their businesses. Thanks to piracy music became freely available to all.
Thus it proves that society lives better without patency law.
In conclusion, I think copyright law should no longer be applicable, so that Society can prosper and everything mainly music , printed books medicine and daily utilities should become available for everyone.

The vertical bar graph illustrates the calorie used by the British men from four different nutrients in three different stages of life .

In first stage of life that is from birth to 24 years, the maximum calories more than 40 % came from milk products, and for the three components meat cereals and vegetable were almost in equal quantities that was 20 % each. In middle age that is 25-49 half the calories came from meat, 25 % from milk and remaining 25 % from vegetables and cereals. Over 50 highest amount 62 % was from pulses remaining 20%,13%and 10% from meat milk products and vegetables respectively. Maximum milk was used by youngsters comparing to other two groups.
Overall, highest amount of meat was consumed in middle age group while milk remained major component of food in young age and cereals remained main food in old age men.

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Christina-IELTS-Extreme-sports

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

In the last decades the idea of banning extreme and dangerous sports such as sky diving, rock climbing and paragliding has been widely discussed.
While some people argue there should no be limitations to practice those activities, I strongly believe that in order to limit catastrophic consequences derived from these sports, age restrictions, training courses and safety measures should be implemented .

Although jumping out airplanes and opening the parachute while flying is considered thrilling and exciting, disastrous accidents may happen if there is an equipment failure. For instance, the ” Australian Extreme Sport Association” has released a study conducted over the last 10 years that shows shocking results. More that 5% of extreme sport lovers suffered from an injury and the severity of it ranged from head trauma, spinal injury and paralysis. Therefore, due the high volume of accidents, strict safety measures should be established and enforced.

Additionally, if extreme sports are accessible to a wider audience, teenagers may want to experience it. Minors, in particular, may not fully understand the disastrous implications of participating in such activities and the way their life may be negatively impacted. In Sweden , for example, in order to practice skydiving participants need to be at least 18 years old and need to have successfully passed an intense training course. Consequently, dangerous sports should be limited to well trained participants able to understand both risks and consequences.

To conclude, I would like to reiterate that extreme sports should be targeting a specific, well trained, and conscious group of adventure lovers. A key element to be considered is the capacity of people to make appropriate decisions knowing the life implications that may derive from them.

The pie charts describe car ownership in 1999 in England and in 1995 in Bromland respectively. While the bar chart provides information on sales of VW cars in England and Scotland from 1990 to 1998.

It is clearly visible that in both pie charts the largest share belongs to cars purchased with just over 50% in England and more than 70% in Bromland respectively. Car leasing has been at only 15% in 1995 but it doubled to more than 30% by 1999. Interestingly car sharing represents one fifth of the total share in 1995 and decreased to less than one sixth in 1999.

According to the bar chart, the majority of cars were purchased in Scotland between 1990 and 1996, while in the last two given years the trend changed significantly. In fact, in 1997 and 1998 both countries reached almost the same amounts of units sold (around 15,000 for both years).

Overall the number of car ownership and car sharing had decreased from 1995 to 1999 while car leasing has doubled. Also a higher amount of car sales toke place in England with the exception of 1997 and 1998 that had similar figures.

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Kalindi-IELTS-STAR

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Vocabulary acquisition is sometimes seen as the key area to promote with regards to improving reading comprehension. Others argue that productive skills such as writing and speaking are more important.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Answer:
It is thought to be important to learn vocabulary to improve reading skills. It is a fact that everyone should have a good vocabulary to understand any source of an article. However, some people think that it is more important to have productive skills in writing and speaking. I partially agree with this statement due to different pros of learning vocabulary and improving speaking and writing ability.

To start with, a lot of words leads to improve good vocabulary which eases reading skills. By knowing lots of words, people can easily understand any piece of reading and they will get motivated to read more and more articles as it becomes interesting. In addition, reading speed will increase if you have a good vocabulary acquisition. This method will improve the usage of language as well as it will lead to grab a lot of information at once. If someone knows most meanings of words then that person will eager to read more and more books and articles which will improve that person’s language capabilities.

Additionally, speaking and writing is also vital to improve a language because without writing and speaking people cannot communicate with each other. Since communication is a must to live in society speaking and writing also play a major role in a language. For instance, even if you know about a language by learning it through reading if you do not know how to speak and write then it is a waste of mastering vocabulary.

To sum up, I believe a language cannot only survive through reading or speaking and writing because both of these components are like the double side of a coin. Those two cannot survive without the help of each other. For example, reading will always improve vocabulary which leads to having clear conversation while speaking and also to write a clear and precise articles.

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Friday, 27 January 2017

GENIEVE-IELTS-STAR!-POLLUTION-ESSAY

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Local governments are pushing companies to move from large cities to regional locations.
What are the benefits and drawbacks of this?

It is true that some governments are encouraging industries to transfer from urban to regional areas. This essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of relocating businesses outside major cities.

There are several disadvantages of moving businesses from urban to local areas. Firstly, the availability of skilled workers might not be plentiful as those in urban centers. For instance, a lack of skilled and experienced personnel can pose a problem especially for new companies. Secondly, the infrastructure is sometimes less developed in rural areas as well as the transportation services which can be difficult for businesses. Finally, companies based in regional areas are further from their clients and other contacts. As a result, this will certainly have a negative impact on the volume of sales and client visit.

On the other hand, there are advantages of industries being outside urban areas. In remote areas, the costs of land are cheaper and there is more space available which is beneficial to businesses. In terms of raw materials, this is usually located in rural areas so it makes sense for businesses to be situated nearer their required resources. Also, workers can be hired for a lower salary. A newly built company, for example, would provide jobs that could boost the economy of deprived areas and usually support from local communities are earned as well. Moreover, locating industry into more remote areas would avoid further overcrowding and pollution which is a common problem in metropolis.

In conclusion, relocating businesses outside the main cities are sensible. This will have both beneficial and detrimental effects on the individual and the economy.

Task 1

The flow chart shows the production of five different types of tea namely white, green, oolong, black and scented tea.

The process of making a tea is basically the same for white, green, oolong and black. At the first stage, fresh tea leaves are sorted out and cleaned. Except for white tea, these leaves are dried up. After that, the leaves are steamed, shaken and rolled. Oolong tea is fermented as well as black tea which is fully fermented. Finally, the last step involves drying of the leaves and for green tea jasmine can be added.

While for white tea, leaves are only steamed and dried. However, scented tea has a unique way in processing, as it is manufacture by using green, black and oolong tea. These teas are dried, and then a pleasant-smelling substance is added to it such as flower and fruits. Lastly, these are cool off and are ready for consumption.

Overall, it is clear that there various stages in this process, from the collection of fresh tea leaves to the eventual production of tea. Among the five types, scented and white tea is produced in a distinct way.

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HAZIM-IELTS-STAR!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Nowadays there are more and more advertisements. Some people think that they have a negative influence on people, and therefore should be restricted do you agree or dis agree?

Nowadays, there is ongoing debate among people about advertisements. Some people believe that advertisements have negative impact on people’s life and therefore should be stopped. However, my actual observation of life has led me to disagree with them. In this essay, I shall explain my point of view by analyzing both sides of the argument.
First of all, advertisements educate people and expand people’s knowledge. From advertisements, people hear about new products, which can provide a great solution for their daily life activity. My unpretentious opinion was echoed by Naomi Miller, Chairwoman of the education department at Hunter University. In an article that she published, professor Miller describes a study of 181 families, some of which watched advertisements, while others did not. The result of the study showed a 95% increase in productivity in the first group because the participants used new products that were invented to improve productivity in some daily life activities such as a dishwasher.
Admittedly, despite all the reasonable evidence on the contrary, some people argue that advertisements influence people negatively and therefore should be restricted.
Firstly, they claim that some advertisements market fake products. Then, there are concerns about the consequences of using fake products, although their argument appears to be somewhat convincing and stands to reason. However, such position should be taken with a grain of salt because when advantages and disadvantages of advertisements are carefully compared, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
In conclusion, while there are strong arguments on both sides of the case, my personal opinion is that without advertisements we would not know what is new in markets and what are the new innovations on our planet. That’s why I would strongly recommend advertising and disagree with their restriction.

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jigyasu-IELTS-STAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Traditional schooling is out of date, boring and stifles a child’s natural talents, various professionals have pushed for an education revolution. Are there alternatives in the education system? Is traditional education doing more harm than good?
Nowadays, traditional schooling is obsolete, under active and restricts a child’s abilities up to some extent. From my perspective, traditional schooling is not effective than practical knowledge. This essay will analyze with suitable examples the impact of traditional education on young ones capabilities alongside with various alternatives of traditional education.
First of all, traditional schooling does not play the significant role in enhancing the cognitive abilities of young ones. Secondly, instead acquiring important knowledge, outdated knowledge is being provided to a young generation. This is due to the fact that obsolete technology has been operating for many decades. For example, recent research by ERA which stands for Education Research Association, showed that only 20% of children boost their skills and creativity through traditional schooling. All in all, traditional education system is not an appropriate selection to be adopted in our academic system.
Moreover, traditional schooling does not have much contribution in flourishing children’s careers. On the contrary, there are numerous alternatives of traditional schooling have been found by professionals. These alternatives are sufficient to recognize children’s potential and strengths. Furthermore, online technology has improved education system and also provides facility to study from any part of the world. For example, study by University of Columbia shows that, since children are more encouraged to use technology or various substitutions, 80% of young ones are competent to prosper in their future. Consequently, it would be advantageous for every child to utilize updated technology rather than being studied by traditional schooling systems.
In conclusion, despite numerous substitutions of traditional school, still traditional school system has been surviving in society for many decades. Traditional school education system is not effective because it is not useful idea for children to be taught by professionals who are not updated and not well qualified. It is predicted that contemporary education system will be adapted by every child for a young generation and the country’s betterment.

The pie charts depict the council expenditure on six different sectors by three regions in the UK in 2014.
As seen in the provided pie charts, maximum amount was spent on leisure by Yorkshire, which was almost similar to expenditure on education, accounted for slightly more than one fourth of total outlay. Whereas, merely below than 25% of the total expenditure was spent on social services and community care in Yorkshire. However, little proportion of money was spent on surroundings and other areas of Yorkshire, which was about 10% and 8% respectively.
On the other side, Derbyshire and Lancashire spent less capital than half of the total expenditure on leisure separately. Moreover, expenditure by Derbyshire on education was about 25% which was almost double to expenditure on the environment and other areas. On the contrary, about 30% cash outflow was done on education. Whereas, Lancashire spent similar amount of the money on community care, social service and the environment.
Overall, huge amount of money spent on free time by these three regions, whereas these regions invest their money in education sector. Least of the expenditures were spent on other areas and the environment. It can be inferred that in future cash would be invested in significant areas of regions.

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ESSAY-CORRECTION-Ashfaqul

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection It is argued that entertaining activities can increase the capability and creativity of the child, that is not happening while child engage in reading. I completely agree with this that enjoyable activities like playing in games consoles or sports competition can make the child more perfect both physically and mentally.
There are numerous reasons that can show playing in game consoles is much superior that only reading. Firstly, computer games need much higher concentration of mind, and it enables children to focus on other work more effectively. Secondly, the complex nature of gaming allow child to work their neurons of the brain so that they think more efficiently, and ultimately it improves their creative thinking ability. In a recent study in Harvard University , it shows child who play gaming console have much better reflex activity that kids who only read books.
Similarly, participating in sports competition have far greater effect than reading. One of the effect is that it improves the physical fitness that keeps the child healthy. In other words, it removes the laziness, boost their energy, and at the same time create the working spirit. Another important point is that sports such as football, basketball need lots of communication and better understanding in between players. So, definitely these kind of games can improvise their communicative skill. Moreover, engagement in sports can create competitive mind that will help the kids to perform better in their study and extracurricular activities.
In conclusion, active involvement in enjoyable activities undoubtedly flourish the mental as well as physical competency.
*******
It is argued that communication among family members notice major improvement in comparison to past time, especially after inception of modern technology. I completely agree with this that digital media increase the interaction between friends and families.

There is ample evidence that indicates people communicate each other more conveniently on regular basis that the previous time. In present time, modern communication media such as internet integrated in peoples’ daily life. In other words, family members are in constant touch with their peers whether they are near or distant place. In a recent study in Australia shows that irrespective of income or education level majority of the people use digital media sun as email, Facebook. So, it is clear that technology gaining popularity and people engage themselves in daily conversation through these digital media.
Again, many people join online community or activity groups to share ideas and express their thoughts , thus it creates a new field of online communication . As a result, irrespective of colour, race these digital screen help people to make new friends. Furthermore, academics break the stereotyped education , become more online dependent and thus interconnected with each other, even two of them work in different places. Moreover, there are many digital content that can show about relationship between parent and children, how the screen content should me maintained for kids. In that sense, now a days, family relationship is greatly influence by the digital media.
In conclusion, in this modern world commutation among friend and family come into new dimension because of the advance technology.

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Thursday, 26 January 2017

IELTS-STAR-Andrew!!!!!

Is technology making us intellectually weaker or more intelligent?

Technology is becoming an increasingly useful part of our lives. Some believe that this is a positive development since modern devices can perform jobs that we find laborious. I, however, believe it is important to develop technology with caution, as surrendering a task to a machine is to lose that skill almost entirely.
By having electronic devices perform tasks that previously took thousand of man-hours, we have freed up much of our time to spend more wisely. Sorting mail, for instance, would have taken whole teams of people working around the clock to achieve, whereas now those jobs are performed by simple computers. With more time available, people are free to read, take courses or travel, so there is no reason for us to suffer intellectually.

The path of least resistance is universally the most tempting, however. Convenience and ease are very appealing and powerful motivators. With extra time to pursue enriching activities, most people instead choose to spend all of their time on their devices. We have clung to the idea that technology can make our lives easier, without asking if it should. Skills are perfected with practice, and repetitive tasks are the best practice; Essentially, we get good at whatever we do frequently.

To summarise, it is not the arrival of technology that is making people intellectually weaker, but the ways in which people choose to spend the free time that technology grants them. We must exercise caution when designing new devices; they should not incentivise people to sit down and do nothing.

Andrew Deaville

Jan 25 (1 day ago)

to Ben

The bar chart above illustrates the number of visitors expected in 2018 to four European cities, ordered by their country of origin.

Each country clearly has a preference when travelling, but Madrid attracts three times as many Mexican people than the other destinations combined. Although Madrid is the third choice for the USA, more Americans will go to Madrid than people from Mexico. However, Madrid is not expected to be very popular amongst Canadians, projecting only 25,000 visitors.

Istanbul is the least popular city for both the USA and Mexico, although for Mexican people it shares this spot with London. Istanbul, however, is expecting around 70,000 Canadian visitors in 2018, making it the Canadian favourite. All of the cities shown will have more American tourists than any other in 2018, with the exception of Istanbul, who will attract around 10,000 more Canadians than American visitors.

Overall, people from the USA will go on more city breaks than anyone else, followed by Canada. People from Mexico will visit these cities less often than the others, but maintain a strong presence in Madrid.

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VLAD-IELTS-STAR!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Should humans adapt to technology or should technology adapt to us? Is technology making us intellectually weaker or more intelligent?

The issue of the technology in our society has grown in importance over the past few decades. On one hand inventions make our life easier, but on the other hand, there are some negative aspects which also have to be mentioned. This essay will discuss both sides, using examples from the education system to demonstrate points and support arguments.
Firstly, there is no doubt that technology devices assist us in numerous tasks, but it takes more and more time for learning how to use those tools. This is because along with progress in science, the technology also becomes more complicated. For example, recent research from Harvard indicates that in the USA more than 40% of educational programs are related to the information technologies. Therefore it is obvious that people have to spend a tremendous amount of effort to adapt to new technology.
Secondly, it should be mentioned that overusing of the technology might reduce person’s mind capability. This is due to the fact that nowadays we prefer to delegate memorizing of information to electronic devices. For instance, according to recent research, the majority of university students in Tokyo do not see the reason to remember historical facts, because of their belief that an answer to any question can be found online via smartphone. Thus, depending on high-tech devices could negatively affect people’s intelligence.
To conclude, I firmly believe that humankind has to review the implementation of the technology, as it is predicted that in the future new scientific discoveries will influence our life much stronger.

Dear Sir/Madam:

I was very excited to find your advertisement for a Senior Architect position opening in Chinese branch of ABCD architects on www.job4u.com website 12.05.2015.

This is John Watson, qualified Architect from Australia with over 10 years working experience on both International and Chinese projects, currently living and working in Shanghai.

In past years I accomplished numerous high-profile architectural projects, created and developed innovative concepts through all design stages towards successful completion, independently and by leading team of designers. Having good understanding of Chinese market, also communicate well in Chinese with local designers and clients.

I am very interested in joining ABCD architects, as I have admired the company for a long time. I am confident that my skills and background will perfectly match the position,
therefore I would love to submit my resume for your review.

Thanks for your time, and I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

John Watson

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ESSAY-RASHI-GREAT-START!

The way of human life is changed a lot since last two decades. The most significant change in human ‘s relationship. In my opinion today people do not communicate with others especially with their family members as compared the past . The growth in technology IS harming relationships and hindering communication with near ones .

Firstly, all aspects of our life are influenced by machines , technology and so on because of globalization . The status update is for telling the state of mind to others but in reality nobody knows . The family is often becoming our second priority over social media. For example smartphones and tablets are invention for communication but we slightly communicate with it rather spent time play with it or surf on Internet. Therefore the virtual world are becoming more family the real ones.

Secondly, unfortunately , most of the families experience economic pressure . Therefore , we see some parents who have to work in two or more workplaces or work at weekends because of this, parents become more tired and have not any time to talk with children. For example, an IMF survey 70% of parents are working in England and do not have time for their children and themselves. Consequently , children are becoming impolite and don not obey family rules resulting in reduce in their relationships

To conclude , from the examples and arguments given I firmly agree that our family members do not like to communicate with each other . In future this technology will be ruining communication ways with our loved ones .

Essay 2:
Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and imaginations than reading. To what extent do you agree? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

Skillful child development is the major concern of parents because it helps in overall growth of the child . In my opinion active participation of various activities can really develop skills then ideally reading a book. There are many activities to learn different skills and develop brain.

Firstly, children enjoy playing on on games consoles because it develop active skills of competition and a winning spirit . The games can really help children to learn , analyse and perform actions, which is impossible while reading . For example PS4 from Sony company really a playful game but also boost memory,increase co-ordination and good for cognitive health. Therefore ,involving children in playful activities can increase the skills and also create interest in learning new things.

Secondly , kids early participate in sports competition held in their schools because in the initial stages of life they are more energetic. and need to channelize the energy in more productive ways . For example in recent educational survey it has proved that children are more competitive and learn from sports more quickly than just from academic study. Consequently , the participation in sports and physical activities can be more beneficial for creating skills.

To conclude from the above given examples and arguments ,I firmly agree that activities are more enjoyable and productive for developing skills then just reading books and imagine . This will help the child to easily blend with society and also creative .

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ESSAY-JACOB-GREAT-START

Although numerous advancements in technology have facilitated communication, many people believe that family communication has decreased. I strongly disagree with this statement and think that communication between families has improved recently.

Firstly, prohibitive prices of mobile and fixed telecommunication are decreasing, making it less expensive to stay in touch for family members than in the past. This is largely because with the introduction of new technologies and increasing competition, prices are falling, thus allowing people to spend more time on the phone when they are not in the same physical location. Take for example commuters, while people are moving from one place to another, they can talk on the phone with family members without incurring expensive bills. Therefore, decreasing costs in the telecommunication sector has increased the number of hours communicating with the family.

Secondly, thanks to the evolution of the internet, migrants are able to communicate more with family back home. This is due to the fact that internet access speeds have been increasing exponentially in the last decade, permitting high quality voice and video communications over the internet to applications, such as Skype and Whatsapp. A recent Skype study suggested that family members scattered in different countries are using the application more than ever. For this reason, although people are moving around the world, they are able to stay in touch with loved ones.

To conclude, factors such as decreasing costs in telecommunication and advancements in technology has provided an aid for families to communicate. In my opinion, more platforms will be created in the future, allowing more ways to communicate between family members.

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and imagination than reading. To what extent do you agree? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.

It is commonly believed that to stimulate children’s skills and development doing fun activities is more effective than reading books. I agree with this statement and I think that youngsters can develop more skills while performing enjoyable activities than while reading.

Firstly, playing sports is an activity that most kids enjoy and can have positive implications in children development. This is because, when kids play sports – especially in team – they need to exchange ideas with teammates to have optimum results, as a consequence their social skills improve. For example, Harvard University research discovered that people who played football when they were children were better at working in teams. Therefore, the link between playing sports and positive implications later in life at the workplace is demonstrated.

Secondly, kid’s museum visits can be educational and at the same time very enjoyable. This is due to the fact that thes kind of museums are made to increase interest in natural phenomena around children, as a result immagination is boosted. A survey conducted in 20 highly recognized universities in Europe showed that 70% of researchers went regularly to children’s museums when they were kids. For researchers, creativity and imagination are key areas to stimulate in order to solve complex problems – this can be achieved at an early age by taking youngsters in school age to museums.

To conclude, the advantages of doing enjoyable activities outweigh those of reading. For instance, some activities such as football and guided visits to museums have proven to be of high value for children development.

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ESSAY-IELTS-STAR!-CHANHAL

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection ****
Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and imagination than reading . To what extend do you agree or disagree? Give examples to proof your position.
Books are an inseparable companion and reading has enormous benefits, nevertheless paying video games can develop skills which are impossible to develop while reading alone. This is a great debatable issue today, this essay will discuss both sides with appropriate examples of recent studies performed by UK.
Playing on Gadgets has myriads of benefits. The salient one is it develops cognitive skills, reflex and spatial skills in child. Children playing on play station are often quicker to react in daily activities and situations. A recent study performed by Cambridge University in UK has revealed that children playing on sony play station were 20 % faster to react to different situations in daily life and they outperformed on psychometric tests. Thus it is proven fact that playing on consoles gives better opportunity to children than reading books alone.
Secondly any type of sport may it be Playing Gadgets or out door sport it cultivate in children a sense of completion and co-operation which is essential for the future. This skill is not acquired by reading books. British counsel of sports has conducted a study that sportsmen are more successful in life than the children who just studied for their carriers.
To sum up, I am of the opinion that children should put some time on playing different games in addition to their studies, so that they can acquire all skills needed to succeed in life.

Communication is less between the family members of late. Do you agree or disagree? To what extent do you agree ?
There is no denying that the communication among family members has decreased significantly .It is very depressing and worrisome for coming generations as it leads to many mental ,physical and social issues . This essay will discuss some of them in detail using examples from recent research studies .
First and foremost reason behind the above developments is shrinking family structures these days. In ancient time people lived in joint families and they were very happy and contended, while now a days youngsters are very ambitious . They are looking for better life and opportunities . So they do not hesitate to move from country side to urban areas, where there is better schooling for their children and much more well paid jobs. Elders do not like to leave there birthplace. For instance recent studies by Indian research institutes reveals that more and more doctors are moving to metropolitan cities in India as they get better pay for their services. So face to face communication has deceased significantly among these families.
Secondly in this fast moving technical world people are more busing comparing to past. There is so much going around a person that he has to keep an eye on all developments to keep pace with peers and seniors. Sometimes people has to work overtime to meet both ends and they have left with no time for their families. For example, recently oil price has fallen worldwide and In Calgary majority of well paid employees were laid off. They are doing 2 jobs to earn the same income. Therefore working for 16 hours no one has time to talk to each other.
In conclusion it is true that family communications are decreasing, which my further lead to weaker relationships. I think all people young and elders should put effort to improve this trend.

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IELTS-CORRECTION-JIGYASU

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Should humans adapt to technology or should technology adapt to us? Is technology making us intellectually weaker or more intelligent?
This century, technology is present in every part of the world. I believe, although technology has been making people intellectually weaker, it has a positive impact on us too. This essay will analyze either humans should adapt to technology or technology should adapt to us with examples from the Canada Government and University of Toronto.
Technology enables us to learn new things and avail the opportunity to survive in contemporary era where the competition is tough. This is due to the fact that technology such as the Internet, computers and mobile phones helps us to acquire the knowledge about anything. For example, recent research by CSA which stands for Canada Survey Association shows that Canadians are gaining 90% of their knowledge from usage of internet because it is not unusual for the residents of Canada to use technology more often. Therefore, humans must adapt to technology.
On the other side, technology has disadvantages as it has negative effect on our cognitive skills and creativity. This is because, we are becoming increasingly dependent on technology, and instead OF generating our own ideas, we prefer to find out from internet. For instance, study by University of Toronto indicates that three fourth of the total population of Canada is dependent on technology. Consequently, humans should avoid the consumption of technology.
In conclusion, Technology should be adapted everywhere, however use of it should be limited to some extent. It is predicted that it may affect the employment as most of the work will be done through technology.

The bar graph shows four different cities that are expected to be visited by residents of three countries in 2018.
Firstly, 100,000 Americans will visit Paris, whereas most of the Canadians and Mexicans will visit Istanbul and Madrid, which will be accounted for merely 68,000 and 64,000 respectively in 2018. Moreover, 20,000 Mexicans will prefer to spend their time in Istanbul and London.
Furthermore, London will be visited by 80,000 Americans, while Madrid will be visited by most of Americans and Mexicans. 44,000 Canadians will visit Paris, while 22,000 Mexicans will spend their time in Paris.
Overall, Most of the Americans will spend their time in Paris, whereas few of Americans will be interested to visit Madrid. However, Istanbul will be the visited by most of Canadians. Least of Mexicans will visit London and Istanbul.

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Tuesday, 24 January 2017

ESSAY-IELTS-KIM-TECHNOLOGY-AWESOME!!!!!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Dear Hiring Manager,

I am writing in response to the advertisement for a Software Engineer, in Jobs Plus newspaper 01/01/2017. With a Bachelor’s degree in Computer Science and hands-on experience using Artificial Intelligence to implement an intelligent personal assistant will meet and exceed the expectations for the role.

In the latest project, I created a human voice detection algorithm which analyzed data 200% faster than the previous version. Aside from the projects at work, I have been working on various speech recognition algorithms by joining a school project. I believe that my data manipulation skills will contribute to the success of your new project.

You will find me to be an enthusiastic and trustworthy engineer who pursues perfection and alternative paths.

Enclosed is my resume which provides a more in-depth view of my qualifications and expertise as a Software Engineer. I look forward to speaking with you about this opportunity.

Yours sincerely,
James

GENERAL TASK 2

Should humans adapt to technology or should technology adapt to us? Is technology making us intellectually weaker or more intelligent?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The issues of technology adaptation have grown in importance since technology has dominated the world and been a part of our lives. Despites the significant benefits that technology provides, it must not be forgotten that the dependency on technology can have detrimental effects on human intelligence. In this essay, both issues will be discussed with examples to demonstrate points and prove arguments.

On the one hand, humans should adapt to technology. This is because that technology has changed culture and the way of life. Recent studies from Harvard showed that 98 percent of adults in the United States have at least one email address and 95 percent of them consider email as their main communication method. Regardless of preference between email and post office mail, people are required to get accustomed to email to communicate efficiently.

On the other hand, there is no doubt that human memory skills can decline as the dependency of technology has increased considerably.

Since technology allows people to complete their tasks without utilizing their brains, people do not need to develop their intellectual skills and their abilities deteriorate accordingly.

Neuroscientists at MIT showed that only 10% of people in Canada remembered their parent’s phone number in 2013 while 80% of people recalled their parent’s phone number in 2000. Digital dependence results in digital amnesia.

To summarize, humans need to adapt to technology to survive. However, they should recognize the downsides that can be derived from the high reliance on technology to maintain the intellectual capacity of humans.

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ESSAY-CORRECTION-IELTS-JIGAYASU-COPYRIGHT

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Do copyright laws limit creativity or reward it? Would society function better without such rules and regulations? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
The scope of copyright is spreading rapidly in this era, the consequences of which are profitable. I believe copyright is big push to creativity. This essay will analyze the reasons using examples behind copyrights being the great source of inventive.
Firstly, copyright gives an opportunity to young generation to show more innovativity. It requires permission from the Supreme Court, who allows an originator to distribute his original productivity. For example, Raghunath who directed a movie renowned as “Dancing star 2” in 2014 which was filmed after obtaining copyrights of movie “Dancing star”. Therefore, it promotes the efficiency of representing the identical idea in divergent manner.
Furthermore, In my perspective, it’s an wonderful chance to demonstrate the same project in impressive form. It might cost an arm and a leg to develop and organize the whole idea. For example, a song (Icho) was released by Canadian famous singer Adam Smith in 2015 whose production cost was almost half of the original song which was sung by famous band “3 Ways”. Consequently, copyright bring out the more talent in contemporary media industries, businesses and many more.
In conclusion, Copyright is the resource of expanding creativity in numerous kinds of industries. In future, the role of copyright is likely to be enlarged and it will become the source of income for society.

The bar graph depicts the four different sources of calories intake by UK males at different life periods.
Dairy contributed slightly above than the 40% of total calories intake to UK males come in the age group and 13% respectively of their calories from dairy. Calories intake through meat by people of age group 0-24 years old increased from 20% to 50% of age group 25-49 years old dramatically.
Moreover, although exhaustion of calories by people of age group 0-49 through pulses was below than 20%, pulses accounted for 65% in calories consumption of age group 0-49 years old. People aged 0 to 24 were taking maximum advantages of vegetables, which was accounted for 20%.
Overall, pulses was the great source of calories intake which was consumed by people aged over 50, while people aged 25-49 took the maximum advantage from meat. Whereas maximum calories to people aged 0 to 24 were provided by dairy.

Question – Can we use folks instead of people?

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ESSAY-CORRECTION-CARLOS

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Society has been benefited by the increasing production levels of companies in order to satisfy the needs of its inhabitants, albeit at a cost in the earth pollution. With a city population increases, the damage also intensifies, the reasons and how can this be solved are outlined below.

The causes for the increase in pollution, specifically in large cities are the increase in consumerism. People are demanding more due to an increase in their needs. Also, an overpopulation can be found in metropolitan areas due to everybody needs to work. For example, studies by Cambridge University identifies that around 75% of the jobs are centralised in large cities like London, Tokyo, Paris. Therefore, causes of the increasing in contamination are in direct relation to an improved quality of life.

Considering the solutions, companies can be awarded by government and consumers by showing their contamination levels. Investing in electric buses and cycleways for commuters will dramatically reduce indices of air pollution, also by considering to share a ride with a workmate. Furthermore, the government might incentive companies by placing factories outside of main cities. For instance, in Norway and Finland, most of the factories are located outside of their main cities thanks to government initiatives. Therefore, environmental practices can be done by companies, government and individuals with the aim to reduce pollution.

To conclude, although the increase in production and overpopulation is necessary bad, there are still actions that can minimise the damage to the environment.

TASK 1 GENERAL

You are looking for summer job. Write a letter to an employer.
-introduce yourself
-explain what type of job you like
-explain your previous experiences and related skills

You should write at least 150 words.

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to apply for a summer job offered by your agency.

My Name is Carlos Moreno I am 32 years old, a student of the University of Canberra currently in my last year.

I would like to apply sort of job related to Hospitality as my major will be in that area, therefore it would be beneficial for me to get an insight of the area before ending my career.
In my previous workplaces I started working as a kitchen hand a Lebot restaurant close to my University for a few months until I got a part-time job in Luxor Hotel in Canberra CBD working there as a bartender and barista. I consider myself reliable, team player and quick-learner. As I am still
studying my availability is from the 2nd of December until the 25th of February.

Please find attached my resume for more personal information. If you have any question about myself please do not hesitate to contact me as your convenience.

Thanks in advance for your kind response,

Kindest Regards,

Carlos M.

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IELTS-ESSAY-CORRECTION-JESSIE-SUPER-!!!!!!!!!!

Essay Corrections available at http://www.ieltswritingtask.net/ https://www.facebook.com/IeltsWritingTask-205577652822039/ https://www.youtube.com/c/ieltsessaycorrection Nowadays, old-fashioned practice of education
has significantly changed over the evolution of technology in the 21st century.

I believe that various options are now available in the public and traditional teaching still provides a positive impact in the society. This essay will discuss the issue and use examples from computer-based technology, and the Philippines to demonstrate points and support arguments.

Firstly, computer-generated lectures and internet search engines are some of the numerous alternatives that has now been implemented in various institutions in the west. This is largely because technology has greatly influenced the educational system with a more convenient and efficient environment. For example, a recent study from John Hopkins University showed that most students using laptops or computers for research purposes has substantially outperformed their counterparts who were reliant in reading books. Therefore, technology has provided various options in improving and making education more interesting.

Secondly, institutions in the Philippines practicing traditional education still impart a positive impact towards young learners. This is due to the fact that despite the scarcity of books and computers in the remote areas of the country, students still gain a sufficient amount of knowledge. Example, researchers from the University of the Philippines revealed that enrollees at marginalized sectors who still practice old-fashioned teaching has presented remarkable results of above average IQ level in most students.

As a consequence, traditional education system provides more of a benefit and do not deter learning.

To conclude, I wholeheartedly believe that technology has revolutionized education and provided alternative practice of teaching, while traditional education has still undoubtedly impart goodness than harm

The pie chart illustrates the six aspects of expenditure in Yorkshire, Derbyshire and Lancashire in the UK in 2014.

In Yorkshire, education have the most spending in 2014 with roughly 35%, while others and environment had the least with approximately 8% to 10%. Leisure, community care, social services are in second, third and fourth spot with nearly 30%, 20% and 15% respectively. Meanwhile, Lancashire presented an equal expenditure in education and leisure with almost a quarter, whereas the other four were equally distributed with one fourth each.

Leisure in Derbyshire has the highest expenses in the same year with under a half, while education and community care has almost combined that figure. Others and environment were tied in 10%, whereas social services had the smallest expenditure with less than 5%.

Overall, it can clearly be seen that Yorkshire and Derbyshire has different priority in expenditure, while Lancashire shows that education and leisure are equal in council spending.

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